COPS SUCK EGYPTIAN DICK

 

---

Yesterday I went to go visit my dad. I left work about 3:40 p.m. and I was happy...I called my dad up and I told him I was on my way and he said, "great! drive careful!"...I turned on my salsa music and I was cruisin like a cool mother fucker down the freeway when I saw the most hated color of all time in anyone's rear view mirror....flashing red lights. Shit....CHP...they don't give breaks to no one! Not even the son of a cop who has a Clark Gable smile like myself. Double Shit.

The cop strolls up to my car like the typical arrogant bastid pig, he takes my license, registration & proof of insurance and returns 5 minutes later with my brand new speeding ticket. I got a speeding ticket about a year ago, so now I can't even go to traffic school and get it taken off my record. How Fucking Great is that???? Its fantastic, just fantastic....I get to my dad's house and tell him that since I came to visit him and left work early he should pay for the speeding ticket. I mean, I would never have received it if I was in my normal routine. So the asshole Mexican Danny DeVito look alike finds a damn loop hole and tells me that he isn't responsible for my ticket since he told me to drive safely....DAMMIT!!!!! This is what happens when your dad is a minority strong Republican. He will fuck you in the ass and not use any lube. I don't need this in my life right now....but, thats how it works right? Mr. Murphy (murphy's law) is always along for the ride and he doesn't give a fuck what you have to say, he's doing it his way. End of story, period!

The night got worse when my wife, who I've been separated from since January 18th, calls me up on my cell and gets all pissy and calls me a bunch of names...I told her that the conversation wasn't getting any better and that we should end it....but no, it continued and it got worse. She was chewing me up like a gay magician and she finally screamed at me that she is filing for a divorce and I will never see our daughter...fuck that shit, so I hung up on her ass and turned my phone off. I was so fucking angry. So then she proceeds to leave me a lovely voicemail, trust me when I say it was very nice and sincere....I hope you're feeling the sarcasm here cause I'm laying it on really fucking thick. This morning I sent her an email saying that I was sorry for hanging up on her and I won't do it again. I mean, I hate getting hung up on, and I shouldn't have hung up on her. I can't control her actions, but I can control mine.

I talked to her this afternoon and she apologized and said that she is going through a lot and has a lot on her plate...she's moving and some other stuff. So basically it comes down to her treating me the same way she did when we were living together, like a big steamy loaf of butt potatoes and then later rationalizing the way she treats me with a bunch of bullshit. So I need to be understanding of what she is going through and blah blah blah same 'ol same 'ol....well, that is just how she is and that is why we are no longer a couple. Which sucks cause I do love her....no matter what the fuck she says.

So I'm bummed about the whole conversation with her, when I see something that completely brightens my day......

What a dumbass...I love it!

YESSSSSS....not like I have anything personally against her or anything, but fuckin a...she just annoys the fuck out of me. Its because of her that i had to endure a stupid fucking furry hat on my toilet for the past 7 years!!!!


So this morning I'm reading totally rad Pissed Kitty's blog laughing at her National Butt Awareness Month post when I get to the end and see a flag of Iraq. Not another fucking prick who wants to bash on everything wrong with politics for their own personal beliefs...but oh no, I was wrong, yes, tis was a little quiz. This chick is awesome....so I go to the website and take the little quiz myself....

You're Egypt!

Curator of ancient mystical secrets, your life on the surface is fairly
typical these days.  Though you are in denial about more things than most people.
 Nevertheless, you're trying to convince people that you're safe despite your more
volatile and unstable times that seem to be behind you.  You like cats a whole lot.
 You'd probably really appreciate The Blue Pyramid.
Take the Country Quiz at the Blue Pyramid

First all, I hate fucking cats....I'm a dog person through and through! Not that I would ever hurt a cat....but I hate cats. Cats are like women, they do what they want, when they want and expect everything to be about them....they come around when they want affection rarely giving it back and are complete picky eaters. While, guys are like dogs....yeah, we slobber, scarf our food down like we're starving Ethiopians. We pee where we want to and as soon as we get an opportunity we're humping you. Yeahhhhh....I'm a dog person....


Well, I'm at work still typing this up. I'm going to go watch a friend of mine play softball....yay. Later though, we're getting drinks. Yay (no sarcasm). So I'm off, have a nice weekend.